By Refraction

The hypocrisy of hate: sending love to Pittsburgh

Nov 4, 2018 | 4:00 AM

HATE IS CHEAP AND EASY.

(suggested listening while you read: ‘Imagine’ by John Lennon)

It’s a shortcut through life that only leads to death; whereas love is a costly, long and difficult road, but at the end of it is life abundant.

When I hear about incomprehensible and condemnable events like the one that took place at the Pittsburgh Tree of Life synagogue last weekend my reaction, like many others, is to think, “How could they? How could anyone be that twisted, evil and consumed by hate? How could someone become such a broken coward that they gun down innocent lives while screaming, ‘All Jews must die!’ in a house of worship during a baby-naming service?”

How could a person travel so far down the road of hate that an act like that becomes possible?

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I think the answer is: one step at a time.

This past week in Kamloops a beautiful gathering was held for anyone who wanted to hold space and vigil for those who were murdered in Pittsburgh, support those who were left behind and show solidarity for all people who are marginalized, demonized, ostracized and terrorized because people continue to choose hate.

It was thoughtfully organized and there were many beautiful, important, timely and love-filled words spoken; it was exactly what is needed after such senseless suffering and I was deeply appreciative and moved by the event.

We lit candles, sang John Lennon’s “Imagine” and wrote messages of harmony on Post-it Notes, but afterwards I couldn’t shake the fact that even in that room, filled with people who were rallying together to combat hate, that very thing was still being promoted.

“I hate Nazis!”, one man proudly proclaimed from the microphone.

And again for emphasis, “I DO HATE NAZIS!”

Even though I wanted to only focus on the intended purpose of the event, those hypocritical words were the ones that kept ringing in my ears long after I had left the room.

Since that night, I’ve been asking myself these questions:

Can we ever justify hate for another person; is it ever acceptable?

Does your hate for me justify my hate for you?

Or does hate for any person (or group of people) ever lead to the peace we crave?

Is there ever any room for hate?

It’s time for us to step back, dig deeper, make it personal and really evaluate our view of hate, because we’ve been here too many times before and we’re destined to keep reliving these nightmares until we each take personal responsibility for the hate we choose.

Horrifying massacres like the ones that took place in a synagogue in Pittsburgh, a school in Sandy Hook, a concert in Las Vegas, a nightclub in Orlando, a mosque in Quebec City and so many others do not begin with the pulling of a trigger or even with the purchase of a weapon made solely for the purposes of human slaughter.

They begin with a single choice, made in our homes and in our hearts, to indulge hate.

In 2018, just as in all of history, we’ve seen murder after murder, hate crime after hate crime, discrimination after discrimination, atrocity after atrocity and we stand back in abject horror wondering “How could they?” instead of asking “How will I?”

How will I ensure that I never leave parts of my heart unexamined; vulnerable to the whispers of hate and malice that can so easily creep in?

How will I lay down the wrongs that have been done to me, even though it’s so much easier to cling to the past than to let go for the future?

How will I do the hard soul-searching that takes time, humility, quiet, repentance, forgiveness and discomfort even though I would prefer to distract myself with mindless entertainment and social media “likes” while my bitterness festers in the background?

How will I teach my children that all people are created equal? That people walking in a caravan seeking shelter, families who are displaced and terrified, neighbours whose skin looks different than ours, the man wearing a turban or the homeless person whose life path we cannot understand are not the enemy?

Because people are not ever actually the enemy; hate is the enemy.

Friends, let’s be brave enough to refuse the cheap and easy while pursuing the hard and worthwhile.

Let’s lay down our hate and instead choose love by asking “How will I?” because only then will we start to see the change we so desperately need in this world.