By Armchair Mayor

City’s newest public art piece should have good wheels

May 5, 2018 | 5:00 AM

I CAN HARDLY WAIT for the unveiling of our next major piece of public art, a monument to the volunteers of the 2017 wildfires.

Public art in Kamloops is always like opening a box of Cracker Jacks — we never know what to expect.

I hope it’s something weird and unrecognizable. Those of you who recall my past rantings about public art will think I’ve lost it but bear with me.

We think of statues as written in stone, which sometimes they are, but we have no way of knowing what future or even present generations will do with them, so we have to be careful.

It’s not always about politics, either. Not even animals are immune.

ARMCHAIR MAYOR

ROTHENBURGER: Who would survive if we had a recall law for City councils?

9h ago

SOUND OFF

SOUND OFF: Strengthening our wildfire training

Apr 17, 2024

ARMCHAIR MAYOR

ROTHENBURGER: City caught flat-footed with sale of The Loop drop-in property

Apr 17, 2024

On the island of Guernsey, a whimsical bronze statue of a feisty donkey greeted visitors for decades. The Guernsey donkey is now gone — authorities decided it gave “a wrong impression.”

A statue of a cow named Charity will be taken down in Markham, Ont.

In life, Charity roamed a pasture that is now a subdivision. A statue of her seemed like a good idea at the time. Home owners in the subdivision have complained that nobody asked them if they wanted a big metal cow next door. So, Charity must go.

This reminds me of Frank the Baggage Handler, who once graced a roundabout in Penticton. Frank, a bronze statue of a man with a suitcase, had no clothes. The mayor, David Perry, was not amused.

As mayor of Kamloops at the time I kindly offered to take Frank off his hands, explaining we weren’t so particular about our public art. (This was later proven out when an anatomically correct bull was installed in Riverside Park.)

Perry didn’t take me up on the offer, and Frank now stands at the Red Rooster winery near Naramata.

Not all statues are so lucky. Storage facilities around the world are filling up with statues.

We all know about Edward Cornwallis, the founder of Halifax, and B.C.’s Justice Matthew Begbie — they’re both in storage. Others, including Sir John A., are also on the hit list.

A statue of Bill Cosby has been removed from the Television Academy Hall of Fame. J. Marion Sims, a 19th century surgeon who has fallen into disrepute, was removed from Central Park in New York a couple of weeks ago to be put into — you guessed it — storage. It’s expected he’ll be re-erected in the cemetery in which he’s buried.

Cemeteries, in fact, may become popular resting places for unwanted statues. At least some of the statues of Confederate heroes removed from parks in southern states are expected to end up as big tombstones.

Museums are another option. Elsewhere in the U.S., presidents, football coaches, celebrities, even Christopher Columbus have been removed from view or are under threat.

In the Philippines, a statue memorializing sex slaves of World War II was removed a few days ago, the suspected reason being it offended Japan.

A statue of Queen Victoria was taken down in Ireland because the government didn’t want public art that represented British rule. Prince Albert is also expected to be taken away soon, for the same reason.

In Birmingham, England, a statue called A Real Birmingham Family featured two single mothers, one very pregnant, with their children. It was removed from the library grounds and consigned to storage.

A likeness of Princess Diana and Dodi Al-Fayad was recently removed from Harrods department store in London and put in a garden somewhere. The reasons are unclear.

Artists aren’t without senses of humour. Nude statues of Donald Trump have been popping up here and there. A statue of Harvey Weinstein in a bathrobe was erected in Hollywood.

Here’s an interesting footnote. In San Francisco, a statue called Early Days depicts a cowboy and a missionary standing over an American Indian on the ground. There are calls to put it in storage because it shows the white men as dominant.

Flash to Kamloops — our beloved Overlanders statue includes a European settler on a raft, upright and clasping the shoulders of a woman we think of as Catherine Schubert, on her knees.

The original design of the statue featured not Catherine Schubert but an indigenous man in braids and breechclout, taking a knee. Close call.

As Kamloops struggles with the ever-controversial issue of public art, and hopefully learns from experience, I have two pieces of advice.

The first is, never erect a monument that represents real people (especially nude ones) or events, or that have any kind of message whatsoever, because someone will eventually find it offensive.

Second, put it on a good set of wheels so it can be easily moved into storage.