Dress-code controversy a pain in the gluteal fold

Aug 23, 2017 | 7:36 AM

KAMLOOPS — I learned something new this past week. You and I have a gluteal fold. Two, actually.

As best I can tell — and I’ve looked this up — on humans and great apes the gluteal fold is located roughly between the gluteus maximus and the tensor fasciae latae, and, no, that’s not a coffee drink you buy downtown on Victoria Street. That would be a short latte macchiato with a sprinkle of cinnamon.

No, the gluteal fold is, it turns out, something we show off when we’re not supposed to.

This came to light thanks to the gym at the University of Victoria. When a student’s short-shorts exposed her gluteal fold during a workout, she was informed of the gym’s dress code and invited to find a new outfit.

She cried foul all the way to the office of the campus newspaper, where she insisted her shorts — and here I quote from a news interview — “give me a full range of motion.”

Not only that, she said, she felt humiliated and, no doubt, robbed of any chance of future happiness.

It’s become quite the cause celebre in the media and brings up the entire can of worms about dress codes, and who has the right to impose them and where and when.

This is a free country, after all. It’s the age of emancipation. Shouldn’t people have the right to wear whatever they want? Are the rest of us being prudes?

In a word — no. Look around. Our schools draw the line at things like bra straps and T-shirts with cuss words.

Restaurants insist on “no shirt, no shoes, no service.” There are limits on what we’re allowed to wear at the office.

There’s nothing discriminatory about any of that. Nobody’s human rights are being violated.

So, sorry, if a restaurant or a school or a corporation … or a gym … wants to lay down rules on how we dress when we’re on their turf, I say they’ve got every right to do it.

All this complaining about supposedly unfair dress codes is just a pain in the gluteal whatever.

I’m Mel Rothenburger, the Armchair Mayor.