Time for new theories on our great society

One Man's Opinion
By Doug Collins
June 25, 2017 - 3:00pm

KAMLOOPS — This seems to be the week for theories. Our Armchair Mayor, who seems to be getting pretty relaxed in that couch of his, has been speculating on all sorts of things while he waits for the start of summer. He’s been talking about what to do about the City’s three-dog bylaw, and his thoughts include a weight bylaw for dogs instead of a number you can have. He suggests we can keep noise down by having parents kick their kids out of homes earlier to fend for themselves. He speculated on the Emperor’s (Liberals) New Clothes.

So he got us to thinking about things too. And Earl Seitz and I want to pose something as well, in keeping with the spirit. It’s our belief that the City is to blame for the big increase in allergies this spring. It’s our considered opinion that because the City did away with herbicide and pesticide use, that the increase in weeds, which are prevalent everywhere this spring, is the cause of the allergy spike.

It makes sense. Those weeds are the biggest cause of allergies and if the City were to go back to allowing pesticide use, aside from the lawns and gardens being free of those irritable pests, we would be able to reduce the number of weeds substantially.

I know it would be tough on pharmacists to lose that money for allergy medication, but wouldn’t it be nice to walk in the park free of the sniffles and the need to fill your pockets with tissue whenever you go out. We might smile more and be nicer to those we meet because we wouldn’t be so stuffed up and irritable. I wonder if the City knows the widespread issues they’ve raised by banning those herbicides. They probably didn’t explore things fully enough before acting.

And another thing- we’re worried so much about dust from the KGHM-Ajax property, but we have just as much dust blowing around every day in the City when the wind comes up. Take the last few days. Every construction project in the City has had dust blowing from it into neighbours’ homes. Talk about kicking up allergies. And we don’t seem to worry about that too much.

I think if the bylaw officers aren’t going to carry batons and pepper spray, why couldn’t they just drive around in trucks equipped with water tanks, and when they see a problem with dust, they could write a ticket, and spray the dust down at the same time.

There are all sorts of things we can do if we put our minds to it and give these things some thought.  Or, alternatively as in my case, relax on the patio in my nice lounger with a glass (or two) of single malt, and contemplate life. Armchairs, loungers, they work wonders for allowing us to let our creative juices flow. And the scotch doesn’t hurt either.